“Poppers” and “Gigi” Williams have four more grandchildren on the way. They’ve been told two are twin boys!

When the Orlando Magic’s senior vice president isn’t busy writing books, making enthusiastic appearances on behalf of the NBA team, or doing battle with some serious health issues, he and his wife Ruth are enjoying the role of grandparents of eight very energetic grandchildren. Having them all in the house at the same time may sound chaotic, but to the Williamses, it’s just another quiet dayaround the homestead, comparatively speaking. You see, Pat and Ruth are used to a houseful as they raised 19 children, 14 of them adopted from countries around the world. “My husband felt a calling to adopt children. However, we may have gone a bit overboard,” says Ruth with a laugh. “But these children would be dead if they hadn’t been adopted. I feel it was a wink from God.”

Imagine that your kitchen table seats 22 and you need to get up in the morning, prepare three meals a day, get everyone out to school, do mountains of laundry, oversee homework, and figure out that it takes a mini bus to get everyone around town at the same time, and you might understand what an average day was like for this large family. “I would say the biggest challenge, as well as the biggest accomplishment, was raising children from all over the world,” says Pat, known for his ability to sell ice cubes to Eskimos through his inspirational public speaking. “It was a real blending of cultures and lots of hard work, especially during the teen years. There was one year when16 of the children were teenagers at the same time!”  He adds that his childrearing philosophy included motivating the children to be out of the house and independent by the age of 18 years and indeed, by then, they were all either off to college, entering the workforce, or joining the military.

Nothing Like the First

Since then, five of their children have married and seven years ago, Pat and Ruth became grandparents for the first time. “I cried when I saw my first grandchild,” admits Ruth. “I was in the delivery room and it was amazing to realize that this child was a part of me in a way. The only word to describe it was ‘Joy!’”

Pat recalls the birth of that first grandchild as a challenge to get to the hospital in 2004, the day Laila was born. He had driven to Atlanta for a speaking engagement that weekend because a hurricane had passed over Central Florida shutting down the airports. “I raced back on Sunday and drove straight to the hospital. Laila was about 24 hours old when I saw her for the first time,” he says. “I couldn’t believe I was actually looking at my first grandchild. I remembered when her mother joined our family from South Korea in 1983 at three years of age. Here she was producing an offspring. Kind of a supernatural feeling…”

It Gets Better and Better

The Williamses are fortunate to enjoy all eight grandchildren on a regular basis as all live in the area and frequently gather for swimming, birthday parties and such. “I love to color and do puzzles with them,” says Ruth, whose license plate reads, ‘Gigi’. “I get to attend their activities, whether it’s sports or dance. Along with the pool, we have a big backyard with a playhouse. My kitchen is huge and they do make a mess, but it’s worth it and so much fun seeing the kids together and growing up with their cousins.” Ruth notes that her busy husband is terrific with the grandkids. “He tells them stories, plays games with them, and attends their events whenever he can. One of the best parts of being a grandparent is we can give them our undivided attention because we aren’t as busy as their parents.”

Pat and Ruth had discussed what kind of grandparents they wanted to be even before the first arrived. “We knew first, that we wanted to introduce them to Jesus. Second, we wanted to provide the best education in their elementary and high school years. For college, well…the parents can take over then!”

In Sickness and in Health

What happens when a grandparent gets sick? What do you tell the grandkids? The Williamses would find out when, in early 2011, Pat was diagnosed with multiple myeloma, a cancer of the bone marrow cells. This is a treatable, but not curable, serious illness that would alter his “normal” incredibly active life of running and grueling fitness routines, ten speaking engagements a month on average, and his ability to churn out motivational best-selling books. In true Pat Williams fashion, he tackled the cancer head on with chemo, radiation, and a stem cell transplant. His customary energy level diminished, but he charged ahead with a stationary bike routine creating a “new normal” that got him past the treatment phase. The wordsmith, now back to a full work schedule, even created a tagline for his health journey… “The Mission is Remission,” and so far so good.

One of the difficulties during that time was that the treatment compromised his immune system, meaning Poppers couldn’t get hugs from his grandkids. “The kids were aware of my illness and they were praying for me,” he says. “Their parents did a good job of keeping the kids in the loop on my progress.”

“Pat’s illness came as a shock because he always took such good care of himself,” Ruth states. “It was hard when the grandkids couldn’t be around him. They would call him on the phone and draw pictures for him. Pat was good about showing them that optimism and motivation works when taking on challenges and prevailing. He doesn’t tell them that he will get well. He just says that God is in control and God knows what he is doing. A powerful message for them…”

Advice from the Experts

What advice would these busy grandparents pass on to others who are about to be or already are grandparents? Ruth simply states, “Be a part of their lives.”  She adds that, in some cases, grandparents can have a greater influence than parents. “As they get older, oftentimes grandkids don’t feel comfortable confiding in their parents. They’ll come to their grandparents instead. We offer unconditional love. My mother always told me that having grandchildren was God’s reward for having children.”

Pat feels it’s important to understand that the role of a grandparent is vital, particularly in this age of broken families, separations, and divorces. “A grandparent can be a rock of stability,” he comments. “We are teachers and mentors, and can have an immeasurable impact on their lives. You want your grandchildren, particularly when you are gone, to think, ‘Wow! What a difference my grandparents made in my life. The things they taught me, the things we learned from them.’ Stay involved and be a difference maker.”