“Ooh! Thanks! It’s what I really wanted!” Every parent loves hearing those words of approval during the holidays and, these days, “it” is invariably a high-tech gadget. Whether the gift is a big ticket item (like a fancy cellphone, laptop, digital camera, or video game) or a smaller item (like an interactive pet), the next words after “thanks” are likely to be “How does it work?” And that’s where holiday fun can come to a screeching halt!

Many people forget that technology means tool, and tools require skill, and skill requires learning. This is different from other presents. You don’t have to learn how to use new mittens or a teddy bear, but you will have to invest time in mastering the intricacies of many of this season’s nifty new techno toys.

Learning can, of course, be fun. It’s a rush to figure something out and have it work on the first try. But learning can also be hard work. Sometimes it involves trial and error (mostly error, or the thing would already be working!). Sometimes it involves reading inscrutable instructions written in tiny print. Sometimes it’s just FRUSTRATING in general… a feeling that may be expressed more or less politely by various family members.   So, if your holiday goal is ‘Peace on Earth’ (or at least in your household), take a deep cleansing breath before unwrapping the tech toys. Then, follow these tips before, during, and after the holidays:

Unwrap carefully.

When opening anything technical, be sure the associated cords, batteries, manuals, and other accessories don’t go missing. The first page of the manual usually has an illustrated list of everything that should come with the device. Be sure you have it all. Keep the box, too, in case the gift needs to be returned.

Power up.

Every tech toy needs a power source. Know what it is and stock up on batteries of various denominations. Better yet: Invest in rechargeables and charge them in advance. Think about whether a power strip with multiple outlets will be useful. If a device has an internal battery that needs eight hours of charging before it can be used, do the recipient a favor (especially if intended for a child) and charge it before wrapping the gift.

Save receipts.

Print out receipts of online purchases and keep receipts from stores. During the holiday rush, stuff everything into a big envelope. After the holidays, confirm that credit card bills are accurate. Then, staple receipts for high-tech items to their manuals and store them. A fat three-ring notebook with a clear plastic sleeve for each manual makes retrieving everything easy should the device malfunction during the coming year.

Give designated gift cards.

Like everything else, many tech gifts go on sale right after Christmas. For kids over ten, the prospect of getting more for their money may be as appealing as it is for adults, and delaying gratification means delaying exasperation. This strategy will also cut down on the number of hours parents spend at the store trying to figure out the relative merits of two gadgets that seem identical to the uninitiated eye.

Read directions.

Most high-tech devices come with a fat instruction book and a thin get-going card.  Reading every line in the booklet may not be necessary, but do study the card. Then, do what it says. Kids old enough to read can be recruited for this process. Some — though not all — children have an intuitive grasp of how to make high-tech devices work, even more so than parents. Ask them to help you with the set up, especially of their own gifts, but don’t assume that they can bypass written instructions.

Consult the website.

Many companies anticipate the problems newbies are likely to have with their products. Although customer service lines may not be operational on holidays, websites are always open. Look for an FAQ list, as your question may very well be on it.

Give a guru.

If you know in advance that a gift will require specialized expertise, consider giving installation or instructional time as part of the present. Don’t assume that your nephew who works in tech support will want to spend his holiday troubleshooting for all the relatives. Apple stores, for example, charge an hourly fee for tech instruction, or you can get a package that includes a training session once a week for a year. It’s a great way to be sure a new laptop owner gets his moneysworth.

Make some gifts low-tech.

Be sure the holiday includes at least one old-fashioned game or puzzle that the family can enjoy together without any fancy assembly required! Read-aloud books, craft materials, building blocks, balls, and other classic toys are all gifts that can be enjoyed instantly by all ages without any special effort.

Finally, if frustration over a tech toy that doesn’t work the way it did in the ads is threatening to drain the joy right out of your holidays… stop! Put the gadget away and move on to another item for the time-being. Or, embrace holiday festivities for a moment by singing holiday carols at the top of your lungs and hugging your loved ones. Remember that those connections — with people, not technology — are the real reason to say “Thanks! You’re what I really wanted.”